Thursday, August 7, 2008

Two Different Sneakers

Today I was lucky enough to hear a story about a friend who has recently re-entered the dating scene after many, many long years in a relationship. She has a real "get out there, and "get on with it" attitude that I totally admire.

She joined a dating service, began chatting with someone on-line, things progressed and they set up a date. Exciting! When they were on the phone setting up the date though, he told her he was planning to bring a camera with him on the date, and hoped that would be OK with her. What? She said her response was less than enthused, and suddenly a red flag went up. But the date had been set, so she forged on.

She picked him up at the train station, and as she saw him coming down the stairs, she knew she was in for trouble. How? HE WAS WEARING A FANNY PACK. Yes, a fanny pack. The fact that his socks were pulled up to his knees was also a problem, but the fanny pack was really all that was on her mind at the moment. But again, she forged on.

The plan had been to play miniature golf, but it was raining so they bowled instead. Desperate to get an end to the date, they played two games and headed off to dinner. Forging on.

During dinner, clearly oblivious to the signs she was showing, he reached across the table for her hand. When he touched it, she said she responded without thinking about it and said "Wow, your hands are so soft!" He got a big smile on his face, pulled his hand away, quickly unzipped the fanny pack and whipped out a bottle of Bath and Body Works Cucumber Melon lotion. "It works so great", he said. "Do you want to try it?" Ever the lady, she said politely no, and forged on.

During dinner, she happened to look down at her date's feet. At first, it just didn't make sense, but after a few more glances, she just had to ask. It looked distinctly like he was wearing one Converse and one Nike. "Are you wearing two different sneakers?" she inquired as politely as possible. He didn't skip a beat, looked down and said "Yeah, I guess I am." That was pretty much it.

They split the check and began to leave the table. After a step or two, although eager to escape, she noticed that one of his shoes was untied. She pointed it out, and he bent down to tie it up. She continued to move along, planning to meet him at the hostess station, when she heard her name called in a hysterical screech at top volume. The entire restaurant glanced their way to see what the scream was all about, only to realize nothing was wrong but that her date was just afraid she was going to flee and leave him there tying his shoe.

Obviously, there will not be a second date with this man for my friend. She will forge on, hopefully to find the person she deserves and who deserves her, and who wears just one brand of sneaker at a time.

5 comments:

nicole said...

Wow, I have totally been blogged. I love that..So funny.This is great & I cant wait for the next one.

KELLY said...

I KNEW YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT MY DAUGHTER IN YOUR BLOG. HOW MANY PEOPLE YOU KNOW DATE GUYS WITH TWO DIFFERENT SNEAKERS? I LOVED THE PART ABOUT THE CUCUMBER MELON HAND CREAM - THAT WAS SOOOO SWEET.

Scrappin Jenny said...

If I had been this woman, I would have ran out of that restaurant like my ass was on fire when he screamed my name. And I wouldn't have stopped till I was in another state.

It's stories like this that REALLY make me glad I'm married.

Anonymous said...

sounds like a total loser to me. love, Steve (like a virgin)

noble pig said...

Okay, I'm behind on my reading here.

What a nut, a fanny pack? She should have thrown the car in reverse and sped off like a bat out of hell. Scary. But like I have always said I have a very close who is the happiest woman in the world with her internet found hubby, they have two kids, three homes and travel the world ALL THE TIME. I know it's rare but it's out there.